Generations have existed for centuries. Lately, people are paying more attention to generations and the impact they have on everyday life, as many baby boomers are caught between raising their own children and looking after their elderly parents. Me, personally, I’m stuck in the middle, and it’s sometimes difficult. I look after two teenage daughters who live at home and regularly keep in touch with my 82-year-old mother who lives independently in her own home an hour away. Statistics Canada estimates almost one-quarter of the 1.65 million Canadians over the age of forty-five who are providing care to a parent or in-law live over an hour away.
Being a long-distance caregiver can be challenging. Do you worry about how your parent or parents are coping? Are they getting to their doctor appointments and eating properly? And all the while you are wondering how to cram your work day so you can make it to your daughter’s school play. How do you ensure you can be there for everyone every time?
In my experience, most seniors I visit say the most important thing for them is to stay in their own home for as long as possible – whatever it takes. I recently received a call from an 80-year-old gentleman who was looking for help for himself and his wife. Both of his adult children live out of town, have careers and families of their own and provide as much support as they are able to. But they are at wits end and need help in their role as long-distance caregivers. They want to keep their parents’ wish alive and keep them in their home.
In my opinion, staying connected and communicating regularly with people we care for is the solution. We tend to notice when a picture is crooked because we see it every day. We realize when our son is starting puberty because his voice changes, and we feel relief when our daughter calls to let us know she made it back to her dorm room. The same should be true with respect to our parents – connect regularly with them and you will know if things change. Here are a few simple suggestions you can start doing today:
• Set a specific time to call each other every day, just to say hello.
• Identify a friend or neighbour who can be there when needed.
• Exchange your parent’s contact information with neigbours or someone who lives nearby that can help. Put it in your parent’s wallet. Plan for an emergency and be prepared.
• Get some help if your parent needs in-home care, support or someone to check in on them or shovel their driveway. You can't do everything and be everywhere.
• Hire a nurse to monitor their health and prevent serious health problems from occurring.
• Take care of yourself – you can't be effective if you are not healthy.
Social media can also help you stay connected with your aging parents and survive the sandwich generation. Think about it, we are the generation that joined Facebook to keep an eye on our children and what they are doing on these sites, and then realized the value social media had for us personally and in business. So why not create a Facebook page for our parents simply to stay connected? I practice what I preach and set my mom up with her own Facebook page. I’ll let you know how that goes in a future blog.
Parenting is the biggest job we’ll ever have and it gives us the most joy and stress at the same time. A recent quote I read states it well: First we are children to our parents, then parents to our children, then parents to our parents and finally children to our children. We will be where our parents are someday – so let’s pave the way now. Stay connected with parents – particularly those who don’t live nearby. It just might be the best peace of mind you’ll ever have.
Being a long-distance caregiver can be challenging. Do you worry about how your parent or parents are coping? Are they getting to their doctor appointments and eating properly? And all the while you are wondering how to cram your work day so you can make it to your daughter’s school play. How do you ensure you can be there for everyone every time?
In my experience, most seniors I visit say the most important thing for them is to stay in their own home for as long as possible – whatever it takes. I recently received a call from an 80-year-old gentleman who was looking for help for himself and his wife. Both of his adult children live out of town, have careers and families of their own and provide as much support as they are able to. But they are at wits end and need help in their role as long-distance caregivers. They want to keep their parents’ wish alive and keep them in their home.
In my opinion, staying connected and communicating regularly with people we care for is the solution. We tend to notice when a picture is crooked because we see it every day. We realize when our son is starting puberty because his voice changes, and we feel relief when our daughter calls to let us know she made it back to her dorm room. The same should be true with respect to our parents – connect regularly with them and you will know if things change. Here are a few simple suggestions you can start doing today:
• Set a specific time to call each other every day, just to say hello.
• Identify a friend or neighbour who can be there when needed.
• Exchange your parent’s contact information with neigbours or someone who lives nearby that can help. Put it in your parent’s wallet. Plan for an emergency and be prepared.
• Get some help if your parent needs in-home care, support or someone to check in on them or shovel their driveway. You can't do everything and be everywhere.
• Hire a nurse to monitor their health and prevent serious health problems from occurring.
• Take care of yourself – you can't be effective if you are not healthy.
Social media can also help you stay connected with your aging parents and survive the sandwich generation. Think about it, we are the generation that joined Facebook to keep an eye on our children and what they are doing on these sites, and then realized the value social media had for us personally and in business. So why not create a Facebook page for our parents simply to stay connected? I practice what I preach and set my mom up with her own Facebook page. I’ll let you know how that goes in a future blog.
Parenting is the biggest job we’ll ever have and it gives us the most joy and stress at the same time. A recent quote I read states it well: First we are children to our parents, then parents to our children, then parents to our parents and finally children to our children. We will be where our parents are someday – so let’s pave the way now. Stay connected with parents – particularly those who don’t live nearby. It just might be the best peace of mind you’ll ever have.
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